Maggie Fisher is sitting at a small round table besides a window in a café. It is late evening and the street lights are shining outside. The girl’s legs are crossed, and she is embracing herself. Her shoulders are slouched. Widely opened eyes are staring at the street without blinking. There is a noise of loud and agitated conversations around. Maggie’s tense appearance contrasts the elevated spirit of the café. Indeed, her thoughts are far away from this place.

It was a hot early autumn day four months ago. Fisher with her chin resting on her palm was listening to monotonous voice of the Biology teacher. Sometimes sleepiness was clogging her ears and the fog was making her sight hazy. Suddenly Liam interrupted the dull lecture. He told some interesting facts and all the students awakened and applauded him. Maggie’s heart sank when she thought with a deep sigh: “Such a smart guy”.

Maggie shudders and comes back to reality. The girl’s eyes start wondering around and her gaze stops at the wall opposite her. There is a picture: a naked woman is depicted lying on a bed, while Eros is sending an arrow into her heart. Fisher has seen many versions of this mythological plot in different cafes and hotels in various countries. The girl’s nose crinkles, she feels sick, and hurriedly looks away. Again this cheap scum! she thinks and a current of irritation causes all her body to tremble for a while.

The girl moves to the opposite side of the table in order to sit with her back turned at the picture. Maggie perceives the softness of the armchair. Then she focuses her eyes on the chestnut surface of the table, and all sensations cease to bother her.

It happened around two months ago in a sushi restaurant.

“You’re special,” Liam said. Maggie felt that her heart skipped the beat. It was their first date. Her pale cheeks blushed when she noticed with the corner of her eye that the waiter had approached them. She thought that he might have heard Liam’s confession.

The waiter put the plates with sushi in front of Liam and Maggie, said “Enjoy”, and walked away. Maggie raised her tear-soaked eyes at Liam hoping to meet his eyes. However, he was not looking at her anymore. He started to wolf down sushi.

Maggie recalled her childhood when she felt herself unique: during Arts lesson in Primary School she created a picture that caused her teacher’s fascination. The teacher even invited Mr. and Mrs. Fisher to school. Mom called her daughter “genius” for a week after that occasion.

“Really?” she asked quietly.

“Yeah,” Liam replied while chewing the sushi roll, “I wanna you to become my girlfriend.”

“Yes, of course,” Maggie grinned.

“Here is your hot chocolate, Ms,” suddenly a loud voice announces. Maggie raises her head and discovers herself not in a sushi restaurant on the first date with Liam but in a café after the painful break-up with Liam. She winks away tears and forcefully smiles at the waiter – a young man with styled blue hair.

“Thanks!” she replies while the waiter is transporting the cup with hot chocolate on Maggie’s table. Fisher is clutching her hands, uncomfortable with the fact that a stranger sees her red eyes and puffy brows. 

“Enjoy!” the waiter smiles back and leaves.

Maggie stares at his back until he disappears behind the counter. She feels gratefulness for his indifference towards her swallowed appearance. At the same time, there is disappointment with his fake friendliness in her heart. Her eyeballs feel as heavy as dumbbells. She drops them and sees the black surface of her hot chocolate. Everything inside her is full of terrible sourness. It seems as though her blood vessels and alveolus in her lungs are clogged with lemon juice. She puts her hands around the warm cup and lifts it. The first sip sends sweetness around her body and it feels relaxing. Unfortunately, it does not last long.

Maggie and Liam went to Greece for Christmas holidays. One day they were walking around Acropolis. Maggie constantly blushed because it seemed to her that everyone was looking at her with admiration. There were reasons for this intuition. She was wearing her best dress that exposed her pale fragile shoulders and arms and emphasized the slimness of her silhouette. Also, Liam was taking selfies with her almost every minute. He went insane with my beauty, Maggie thought. Her lips were hurting from smiling all the time and she was almost blinded by the sun that was constantly shining into her face. Liam begged that she did not cover her “magnificent eyes” with sun glasses.

Later in the evening as she was skimming the photos, she suddenly shuddered with disgust and frowned. She noticed that on every photo Liam was at the front and she was at the back.

Maggie is brought back to reality by loud voices. A group of young men has just entered the café. They are now taking seats around the table in vicinity. One of them shows his new watch to the rest:

“Look how cool it is!”

“Yeah! Expensive stuff, isn’t it?”

“Now, all girls are yours!”

Maggie shudders with disgust and frowned in the same way as at that evening in Greece two months ago when she was looking through photos.

Then she remembers that dreadful day when she was in Liam’s apartment and he went to the bathroom to take a shower. She was sitting on the sofa, watching T.V. when suddenly Liam’s cellphone beeped. Liam forgot to switch it off and according to the settings it never turned automatically. Maggie’s heart leaped in her chest. Cold sweat covered the palms of her trembling hands. “That’s immoral” her conscience was screaming while she tiptoed to the bathroom and listened for a while. When she got reassured that Liam was indeed in the shower, she returned to the living room. She memorized in exact details the placement of the phone before picking it up.

There was a message from Liam’s friend. It said: “what do I say her?” Burning with curiosity, Maggie opened Messenger and saw the whole chat. She started scrolling up. Fisher saw selfies from Greece sent with the following text: “I’ve a girlfriend now. Be jealous!” and a smile sticking out its tongue. Maggie scrolled up and up: “Tell her she’s special. I bet, she’ll go crazy. Be smart, bro. It’s not hard. Just blab. They’re generally stupid. Anything can impress them, bro.”

Maggie bit her lower lip so hard that she sensed blood in her mouth. Tears began to stream down her cheeks. Then her senses became unusually acute. She heard that Liam turned water on again. Washing the soap off, a thought flashed in Fisher’s mind. She dropped the phone on the sofa and rushed into the hallway. She put on her snickers and tied the laces with great difficulty – so strong was the tremor in her hands. Then she opened the door and shut it. She did not bother to lock it with the key. The thoughts about Liam’s safety did not even appear in her mind. It was preoccupied with the only thought: “Get away!”

The shape of the cup with hot chocolate is becoming sharper and more lucid as Maggie is returning from the past. She is staring at it without blinking. A clot of tears is enlarging in her throat. Fisher stands up and rushes to the counter and drops the coins. She does not reply to the cashier with “Good evening” as she storms away.

In the night streets of the town Maggie Fisher is walking with her hands pressed against her feeble chest where the heart is pulsating on an extremely fast pace. Her tear-soaked eyes are trashing about, looking at showcases of shops. Through the windows she sees rings, bracelets, necklaces, souvenirs, clothes and a countless number of other objects. She desperately wishes that people’s souls were as transparent as showcases but not as occupied with things that have no real value.